Have You Had a Great Coach and Mentor?

Early in my career, I worked for an amazing leader who was an exceptional manager, mentor, and coach. His guidance had a profound impact on my career and management style and taught me the importance of genuinely caring for and growing your employees. Recently, I had the opportunity to reconnect with him over dinner. During our conversation, I told him how much he had influenced me and what I had learned from him about true leadership. He was grateful for the compliment but also surprised by my remarks. You see, for him, coaching and mentoring was just a natural part of managing – it was simply who he was.

For my boss, coaching and mentoring others was deeply ingrained in his management style and in his very being. It was reflected in his life, attitude, smile, words, and actions. His comments at dinner made me reflect on my own approach to coaching and mentoring. Is it truly a part of who I am, or am I just going through the motions? If so, how can I make it a more natural part of my leadership style? As I thought about this, three key areas came to mind on how I could become a better coach, mentor, and leader.

First, be and act like a true coach. If you consider the analogy of a sports coach, you can gain a good understanding of the characteristics of coaching. From my observations and experience, good coaches focus on skill development and performance. They provide immediate feedback, both positive and critical, that encourages improvement with active direction and support. In other words, coaches help athletes or business professionals learn and perfect their skills to unlock their potential and maximize their performance. I believe in the mantra of raising the bar, and I think active coaching is a key way to help others see their potential and raise the bar for themselves to reach new levels of performance. After all, if no one tells you where you need to improve, how can you make any improvements?

Second, understand the difference between coaching and mentoring and lean into both. For me, coaching is a more day-to-day activity to constantly encourage and provide feedback for improving and honing skills. Mentoring, on the other hand, is a more long-term and strategic approach. It involves building a trusting relationship where the mentor can share their own experiences and provide support for the career growth and development of the mentee’s. While it is related to performance, it is more about preparing an individual for their future by sharing knowledge and experience and becoming a trusted advisor. However, mentoring requires just as much effort from the mentee!  It is a two-way street that requires a passion and desire to learn and grow. 

My final observation on becoming a better leader for coaching and mentoring is to be compassionate. In my opinion, this is the trait that enabled my boss to be a natural coach and mentor. His compassionate attitude made him genuine and authentic as he guided me, praised my efforts, and yes, critiqued and addressed areas for improvement. He truly believed that all his employees wanted to do a good job and were doing their best to exceed expectations. His role was to help them reach and exceed those goals for the company and, more importantly, for themselves. His compassion for each employee, and his desire to see them grow and succeed, was his reward as a manager and as a leader. He actively coached his team, pushed for excellence, and mentored them for the future.

I suppose my boss is still coaching and mentoring me after all these years. Maybe his surprised response to my compliment at dinner was yet another growth opportunity. I’m sure he knew that his reaction would make me stop and think about myself as a leader. Isn’t it wonderful to have a great mentor who is always pushing you to improve yourself?

I consider myself lucky…now it’s time to pay it forward.